Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Kate Hudson

Here’s an article that made me want to slam my computer into a dirty bomb. Of all the things I could care less about. Of all the rancid trimmings dropped from the demonic buffet tables of our corporate slag-off world, Reuters presents this article:

"Kate Hudson finds success fun, but hard earned"

(Well Gollee Gee. How do you like them apples? Success if fun, but hard earned. What a nice little nugget of wisdom from Kate HAWN. Sheeeit. Success is hard earned? What about failure bitch??? There’s a lot of hard-earned, UN-fun failure in the world. Most of the hard-earned failure rocks a steam-wand as a barista at Starbucks to serve you your mocha-decaf fat-free frappacino beyotch.)

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Actress Kate Hudson is lucky, and she knows it. But the 27-year-old's success in her relatively short Hollywood career has been hard earned, even for the daughter of a popular Hollywood star.

(Success? How much success has she had? She was in one movie as far as I know. The one where she played that groupie-floozie. Ironically, she went on to marry a lead singer. As far as I know, the greatest acting role she ever played was pretending to be attracted to the lead singer of the Black Crows. Man is he fugly)

She appears onscreen again on Friday in romantic comedy, "You, Me and Dupree," starring opposite Owen Wilson and Matt Dillon. Hudson is the daughter of "Private Benjamin" Goldie Hawn who raised her with long-time companion Kurt Russell, a veteran of more than 40 years in show biz.

(You, Me and Dupree? Are you serious.? Even the title sucks. I like Owen Wilson and Matt Dillon, but this looks dreadful. I smell the acrid smoke of executives being fired right now.)

She also earned an Oscar nomination for best supporting actress in her first big role in a major film, playing rock 'n' roll groupie Penny Lane in "Almost Famous."

(That was also her last big role…yeah, that was in 2000. I’m sure she’ll get another nomination for You, Me and Dupree)

If it all sounds like it came too easy, it didn't.

(Uh…easy isn’t the word. How about Nepotism? I am so sure things would have worked out the same if she had to start by slinging hash and bopping the night manager at Johnny Rockets like everyone else.)

"I didn't want to be associated with my parents, didn't want the perception that I rode on somebody's coattails, and I had to be very conscious of that," she said. "I feel pretty lucky. I feel pretty blessed, but I'm a real hard worker.

(Translation: I can’t trick people into thinking I did this all by myself when I have the same last name as my famous parents. I don’t want people to think I had help, because then they’ll judge my career against the success of my parents, which right now, is well…less than awesome. If my career goes down the crap hole, even with the help of dual-hollywood stars, then that means I must be a really bad actor. Maybe even worse than…oh god, not worse than daddy…ulp…)

So this is the news item that studio is trying pump the movie up with? What about doing an in-depth report on the Butterscotch Stallion’s (Owen Wilson) ass-licking technique. According to The Superficial the star brought a girl back to his apartment and licked her ass for two hours.

Her ass? Two hours? Everyone dips a digit in the mud flats everyone once in a while, but a 2-hour Ass lick? Sounds like someone was on ecstasy. Either that, or the Butterscotch Stallion might prefer to be with the Italian Stallion. (throws a new twist on the name BUTTerscotch Stallion. )




Anonymous Anonymous said...

A couple with a single friend find embarrasing situations that try their patience. This was not the pitch. Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson with [fill in other male star] in a light comedy that has OW like-nekkie for 70 minutes (I am guessing here). Now that is a pitch. I cannot bear looking at the advertising. Make sme wretch. Not as bad as my job but pretty bad all things being relative. Fugly? How about bugly? Love the Super Duper Man rant. Mad magazine booklets from teh 60s had tis guy down cold. Super Duper man they called him. Just a big dumb lug with a cape in their eyes. Me bend steel now. Hoo haw!
...the ole AB

9:56 PM


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